10 Reasons WHY Relationships Fail

If you are able to recognise the symptoms of your anger you will be able to control it and stop it from taking over the relationship. 

It is always best to talk through the reasons why the arguments start even though with many couples talking leads to even bigger arguments! With such a clash of personalities it is so important to recognise one anothers unique communication style.

You both may want to resolve the matter and small changes really make a huge difference. It is so important that outside influences stay outside of the relationship. In many cultures the marriage whilst being of two will have many on both sides of the family who have a big say in the relationship with one partner expecting the other to bow down to their family expectations. 

However having unrealistic expectations is going to lead to more arguments and even more hurt. Undermining one another not accepting one another's faults and repeatedly saying YOU are right is just disrespecting the relationship.

When kids are a part of this relationship many many couples live in this cycle of emotional carnage without even accepting how much emotional damage they inflict on their kids.

If you cannot trust your partner why are you in this relationship? Has trust been broken too many times already for you to trust again or is it yourself you do not trust and project that dishonesty onto your partner?

 ‘Why are Relationships so complicated, if a lifetime of love and happiness is how it was meant to be why then you may be asking is it not happening.  

I just can’t seem to find the right person, why do I always end up with a cheat’, wish I could meet Mr/Miss Right’.

Relationships don’t have to be difficult, but we make a great job of doing so. This kind of thought process is just why the grass is always greener on the other side for some zodiac signs.

Having set great expectations of a relationship before even meeting your partner unwittingly creates big expectations.

We all wear many hats in our lives, from children, parents, brothers, sisters, friends, work colleagues and partners. Underneath each of these hats we are the same person. 

We simply adapt our personality to the situation but the root of who we are is the same.

Thousands of people all over the world just don’t know how to deal with the ups and downs of intimate relationships. There are two reasons why this could be the reason.

Many of our clients don’t think about how they sabotage their relationships by disrespecting their partner. 

You are responsible for your own actions, beliefs and feelings. The way we perceive ourselves is how others will behave towards us. By not challenging a partners misguided beliefs leads to you losing a part of the person you inherently are.

You end up being defined by your partner and others because you just do not want to rock the boat! It is not healthy being in a relationship with someone who feels threatened by your personality. Do you want to be almost invisible in the relationship?

 "One Relationship Two rules"

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In many cultures there is an acceptable rule in a relationship called one relationship two rules. One rule for me and another for you. "I will cheat you will not" "I will socialise go out have friends you will not" 

The message given is "you will abide by my rules because I am better than you"

When you disrespect yourself in a relationship and don’t set good boundaries, your self-esteem is impacted. If you allow the relationship to continue in an atmosphere that does not feel respectful and loving, feelings of depression, anxiety and anger may start to build up inside you. 

Any person who has been in a relationship from good, bad to ugly will tell you that Communication is the key to success or failure. Choosing the right time to have a heart to heart can sometimes feel like impossible with one partner who is busy with other things.

It sounds almost silly to say but is it any wonder couples say ‘I don’t know when things started going so wrong’ ‘he/she never told me anything‘. It is these little things which can simply build up over time creating a mass of negative feelings towards one another.

• Master the art of listening, it is incredible what you actually hear when you put your mind to a conversation

• Read your Mercury Signs and get a better understanding of not only what to say but when to say it.

The past impacts our present every day, whether it's in how we approach certain situations, or how we emotionally react to what people say.

In romantic relationships, people can sometimes repeat behaviours to make up for the mistakes of their previous ones. It essentially means you're trying to fix the past by pursuing similar situations or people.

If you felt that you weren't listened to in a previous relationship, your way of communicating might be more aggressive in the new one. If people mimic the bad communication they had in previous relationships, this can easily lead arguments.

People have emotional triggers and this could be anything that upsets them these are where your unhealed wounds are. For those people who do not have emotional wounds, a partner can say something to you that's irritating and annoying but it won't affect you in the same way.  

The key is to recognise your emotional triggers. 

If you were cheated on in the past, a lack of trust can make its way into your new relationships which can lead to numerous arguments, and even a break-up.

A lack of trust can bring out controlling behaviour. Asking your partner to see their phone to check their messages is a controlling habit that will eventually lead to your partner being defensive, as you are invading their privacy.

Most people who don't trust don't have confidence. 

You might find that you are subconsciously pushing your partner to leave you, or demand constant reassurance from them, which can become draining and exhausting for them.

Naturally when the chasing is done and intimacy has become a routine, life can start to feel dull if the relationship is not injected with fun and attention.

• Do things you did when you first met
• Tell one another what you feel
• Be complimentary to one another
• Stay in touch with one another in the day
• Make a date to go out together
• Make sure you both have active social lives with family or friends-it will keep your relationship healthy

Culture & Religion are an important part of life and are so deeply rooted into us they can cause huge challenges in relationships. 

A long-term relationship or marriage with someone of a different culture or religion requires many compromises from how to live and what to eat, what to name any children and what religion to bring them up in.

Talk about the things you agree on and don’t just talk about the sensitive emotional button issues that divide you. Don’t shy away from being clear as a couple on what you want and what your hopes and dreams for your relationship are.

There are most likely to be outside influences such as family or friends who will apply pressure to your relationship. If your family is against you marrying someone, you may well marry them but you need to understand that things aren’t going to be easy. You will still need your family so don’t burn all your bridges. 

Be clear that you don’t want to lose the connection to your family. In the end your family are likely to come around.

Cultural and religious differences may well prove too much, and the relationship won’t survive. If there are kids in the marriage they may be the glue that bonds you.

Its part of the human experience though and it life does not end there.